Cycle 3 Summary "Another One Done!"

 

With the end of Cycle 3, it's dawning on me, I really am almost finished!  As I start writing, it seemed like a non-eventful cycle, but as I keep writing, it was hugely eventful!

I'm pissed that so far Doc Dean looks to be right.  I was really hoping my body (and mind) would start adapting and I would be maintaining better each cycle, but that's not what's happening.  My mind is fine.  My body is reacting "normally" or "as predicted," which is what currently pisses me off :) 

Week 1:

And... detour right off the bat!!  So far, my bloodwork has passed muster on Day 1 and I get my drugs as scheduled. Today, my bloodwork failed and this is AFTER a week off.  I was so upset.  So, in addition to my "bad" drug week, I got the extra addition of the blood med, Zarxio, to add to the fun.  First time to do this combo and I am NOT happy.  

Definitely harder than the last 2 cycles.  Fatigue, constant headache, nausea and throw-ups.  So far, I'm still resisting that blasted 4-drug nausea regimen I have for home.  Gawd, so many drugs at TX Oncology and I just can't add to it when I get home.  I'd rather be sick and muddle through.  The extra meds add to my already fuzzy brain and worst thing is I don't notice it til my brain starts clearing!!  And I run backwards when I hear constipation, so I'm not a fan of those extra meds.  So still treating with lots of white starches and ginger.

LOL, fun memory for me.  My Grandmother, no matter the ailment, would alway ask about the bowel movement.  Dog is limping... how's her BM?  I'm on crutches... how's your BM?  It was SOOO predictable that sometimes I would set something up just to hear her say it.  So, in memory of my Grandmother... no constipation please... so no at-home nausea meds.   I loved her so and any chance to smile while thinking of her is welcome indeed! 

Thanks Meredith McGraw for treating me to this book you told me about.  

Hugely entertaining read about Bill's thru-hike attempt on the Appalachian Trail.

Week 2:

Wow, my bloodwork passed.  Not great, but the Zarxio dealt with last week's poison AND got me passable for this week.  My Doc and I were steeled to do Zarxio both weeks, which freaked me out so I'm so relieved and grateful to NOT do it 2 weeks in a row!

~ Doc Dean ~

Ok, so my oncologist is not a large man but he has a GINORMOUS personality and I got to meet with him again during week 2.  He pushes open the door like it's a surprise party and bellows "MSSSSSSS WRIIIIIIIIIGHTTTTTT" for pretty much the whole floor to hear so of course I bellow back and the laughter begins.

He basically seemed on the verge of giggling most of the time.  (I'm sooooo glad when my docs like me!!) He asks standard open-ended questions:  How're you doing?  Anything major?  Any questions to start?

I tell him I want him to go first because he may answer some of my questions (as I show him my list) and that gets him laughing again!  Says he really enjoys my questions and he will tell me what he knows so far but he still expects me to come up with some good ones :)

• Blood - All is performing as expected.  The crashing is normal and I resist the urge to chastise a bit that I was never warned.  By now it's common each cycle.

• Timing - Says it's a rare patient to stay on track with timing.  Most request breaks or intermission, so he's giggly again that I'm staying on-track with the schedule.

• Riding - Here's where he really lost it.  I told him "I bet you were laughing your ass off when I said I wanted to ride 130mile ride each month."  He leaned in and asked "are you doing it?" and his eyes were all dancing.  When I said "yes, but no thanks to you!" He roared again and wouldn't stop.  I tried to whine about how awful it was and that made him laugh harder and of course I couldn't stop grinning either.  When he had to wipe his eyes, I knew I had him :)

• PET Scan - Got the zillion images from my November PET scan and all looks very good TO HIM.  I see glowing things everywhere and I thought that was bad.  He says there's still some questionable areas and we'll do another one in March, but he thinks the questions are all inflammation and scar tissue from the nephrectomy and not new cancers in that area that used to have my kidney.

• COVID-19 Vaccine - Said he prefers me wait til chemo is over, but if I get the call to get it, go get it.  No contraindications with the chemo, it just might knock me down more is all.  And I can handle that.

• Afterwards - I need to ask more detailed questions, but for 3-4wks after, I still have to be isolated while my immune system comes back.  ARGH, I am SO ready for someone besides me to cut my hair!  But he's asking me to still limit close quarters for a while. 

Bottom line, we will confirm the week of Jan 25, but all signs point to me staying on track with the 4 cycles.  No extra cycles expected!!

~ Doc Thurman ~

Also had my first post-surgery cystoscopy, which is NOT something you really want your crush-surgeon doing.  Kinda hard to maintain a crush on the guy who sticks a giant tube up your little teeny urethra to take a look at your bladder!  Sigh... but that's what I did.

Like other times, the science nerd in me came out, so nurse Shannon moved a monitor so I could see everything DocT did.  (she's amazing too!). He even slowed down and let me ask questions (again, you don't really want to slow this procedure down if trying to maintain a crush on your doc).  He pointed out the scar where part of my bladder was removed and sewn up, where the other ureter still exists leading to my healthy kidney and other "scenic points" along the way.  I forgot til he was finishing and made him go back a bit so I could snap some quick photos.  Fascinating!

The little pucker towards the top is the ureter going to my good kidney and the light is showing the skin to be all nicely pink and healthy.  We could see the blood pulses like a tiny heartbeat!

The dark at the top is the actual scope going into the urethra opening and the scar from the other ureter and part of my bladder being removed is the red splotch at the bottom...I think.

Doc T seemed kinda anxious at first so I assumed he'd had a busy morning, but afterwards, he kinda plopped in the chair and looked ready for a break and a visit so I asked how I did compared to others.  He sounded so relieved to say "your bladder is perfect."  Naively I actually asked if that was unique and what he thought he'd find and he bluntly answered at least half the time, there are already cancer tumors 90 days after surgery.  Sobering is putting it mildly what I felt.  

So, in his words "and this is our relationship for the next few years."  We will check my bladder every 3 months for 2 years and if all stays clean (please please please please please), we will start increasing the time between scopes.

Week 3:

Still feel pretty crummy but my brain is clearer, so that's a great sign.  I just keep wanting to "bounce back" once the poison is gone, but the infusion nurses really caution me... each chemo treatment is a bell curve:

• Day 1 is your best day
• Day 2-7 you're sinking
• Day 8-10 you kinda flatten out, but....
• Day 8 I hit the poison again, so continue sinking
• Day 9-15 continue sinking but mine seems to be less dramatic than the first week
• Day 16-21 Start gradually improving
• Day 22 Start all over again with a new Day 1, but you never get back to where you were 21 days ago.

And for all who know me very well, one of my lifetime favorite quotes plays in my head daily.  So glad my Mom raised me with Kris Kristofferson :) 

"I'd rather be sorry for something I've done than for something that I didn't do."

-       Kris Kristofferson